Ballerina Sloane

Sloane started ballet last week.  She is a princess and she LOVES it.  She couldn't be more excited when she is dancing around.  She was really nervous for the first few minutes last week....this week was very different. 

She had two mishaps this week.....
one-her face met another child's wand.
two-she was fancily running around and looked back at me....the then tripped on the "ferry wing bin" and FELL IN.

On both mishaps tears were shed, more out of embarrassment....because let's not pretend that Aiden has harmed her in many a ways over her short two years.

I love how much she loves dance.  She is a hyper little nut before dance and screams like a baby when we have to leave.

Football kid

Aiden loves football. Period.  Loves it. Would play it all day every day. Today was the final game of his 2nd season. I like how he feels about himself when he plays. He stands taller. Walks prouder. I like that. I want him to feel good about who he is and what he is capable of doing.  I want him to always win, I wonder if I can do that for him? .... I can feel the eye rolls from people right now.

He's good. Makes me proud. I always want for him to do what makes him happy. If it's football then by God play your heart out kid. If it's barbies next month, have at it.

Do what makes you happy.

Work hard at it.

Do your best and you will be great.

 

more. but what?

I want to do more.  I want to do more for people that don't have what I have.  I know, I don't really have much on the outside.  I live with my mom.  I have two kids.  Divorced at 29. BUT I am happy.  I have healthy children.  I have a good job.  I have great friends.  I have amazing family.  I have a supportive partner in all that I do.  I can do more with what I have.  But what?  How do you do more?  How do you help people get to a better place?  How do you help kids feel safe and warm each night? 

My life is good.  It has better days then others.  But it is really good.  I wake up each morning, go to work, see my kids, and end the day either putting them in bed or talking to Kyle about our days.  I think every life could be harder than mine.  Why wallow in my own self-pity of what has become my life of not being with my kids each night.  They have a great dad who loves them.  When I am down, I remind myself it could be so much worse and move forward.  I wish more people were able to do that. 

My job, I love what I do.  I am good at what I do.  I could be better, who couldn't be better at what they do?  With all the changes and politics involved in education now, I simply try to turn my cheek.  I complain and vent to all the right people then wake up the next day and go do MY job.  I wonder if there is something else I should do? If there is a bigger calling for me somewhere....maybe so. What is it? 

I think too often about doing more with my life.  I don't feel like I haven't done enough I just want to do more.  Make an impact on more than the students in my classes.  I want to reach people and fight for people.  Maybe I need to look into this.  Where do I start?  What do I start? 

I have a small passion for kids of divorced families.  I have been on both sides.  I get it.  I get it whole heartedly.  I know how hard it is watching your parents and I know how hard it is watching your babies experience divorce.  But I think I could do something with this.  But what?  The divorce class you take is a joke.  Parents don't listen to that crap, especially not the ones that need it. 

Hmm.  So much to ponder. So much to think about.  So much I still want to do.  But what?