Yelling at your kids....

I have read articles talking about ways parents/adults talk to children and how adults would never talk to other adults the way we talk to children.  While I agree that sometimes adults are a little hard on kids, I have to say that adults would never do some of the things that my kids do.

Here are just a few examples of things I have had to say to my kids that I NEVER thought I would have to say out loud--and I especially don't think these are things I would ever have to say to an adult.

1. Please stop putting lipstick on and kissing the walls.
2. You should never wipe your butt with clorox bleach wipes, now go shower to make sure you don't have some weird reaction. 
3. Stop sucking your thumb.
4. Why are you licking your hands?  Do you know how dirty they are?
5. You cannot eat the gum you pick up off the ground. And eww, that is disgusting put it down. 
6. If you had listened to me you would not have run into the wall in the first place. 
7. You got kicked out of gymnastics?  How does a 6 year old get kicked out of gymnastics?
8. I told you not to touch the cactus...now look at yourself. 
9. Why would you rip a 20 dollar bill in half?
10. Looking at the pictures is not considered reading. Now read the words.
11. You knew the stove was on, why would you touch it? 

You guys, this could go on for days.  Everyday I say something that I swore I would never have to say.  Adults don't wipe their butts with clorox or eat candy off the ground -- at least the adults I choose to surround myself with don't.  

Kids are kids.  They need to be yelled at.  They need to be taught.  They need to be scared to never make some of the same choices again.  And sometimes me raising my tiny little voice is what scares them into realizing that what they just did was a very, very, very, bad decision. And sometimes all I can do is laugh--because the only other option is to cry. 

Parenthood.