Wheeler Mission

On Christmas Eve this year our kids went back to their other parents to spend the night then came back to us on Christmas day.  I am not sure what schedule I like more, when they come to us first or come to us second....but I will say I was really happy with how this year worked out. 

On Christmas Eve Kyle and I went downtown and volunteered at Wheeler Mission. We loaded up trays with food and handed them out to the homeless.  It was a great experience.  Most of the people there were so appreciative and thankful. 

As the men walk by you you can't help but wonder how they go to this point in their life.  What is their story?  Do they have kids, parents, any family?  Do they have somebody that worries about them?  Thinks about them?  Do they make efforts to get out of the situation they are in?  Is that a possibility for all of them?

It reminds us that EVERYONE has a story and their story is not less important or less tragic than our own.   Everyone faces mountains, some more often than others.  I am reminded to be thankful for the things that I have.  I have so many wonderful things in my life but the most important things love, shelter, food, and family make my cup runneth over on a daily/hourly basis.  I am so happy where I am in my life. 

I have those four "basic" things and I am happy and many of these men are happy, genuinely happy and they don't have those things (well they do, but only at the willingness of others they have shelter and food).  I would love to hear their stories.  I would love to hear about their lives.

Wheeler Mission hands out THREE meals EVERYDAY for the homeless.  They ask for nothing in return.  They provide shelter for anybody that needs it every night.  It is an incredible thing. I need to volunteer more often!

name change

I remember having to change my name the first time.  I went from a Nunn to a Coffey.  It was so annoying.  As soon as you think you changed everything you would realize there was still something else that needed to be changed.  Your credit cards, debit cards, bills, student loans, license, passport and the list goes on.  I just don’t understand why I have no patience for stuff like this.  Now that I am married my name is going to change to Barrentine and I just haven’t worked up the patience to get myself to the BMV.

I really wish we were all just given a code and went by that.  Not like our social security number, that is WAY too many numbers for me to remember.  But a group of numbers and letters…..From now on refer to me as 91A12, I like the sound of that.

This way people can have any name they want and don’t have to change a thing.  Your ‘code’ would be your true identity.  I guess it does kind of sound like a prison inmate number…. if you looked at my license picture you would see it totally fits a prison ID number (I look like I had just gotten taken down by Big Bertha in cell block 6).

A code…..it is genius!

Damn, if I were president I could solve all the first world problems!

Playing with toys...UGH

I am just not equipped to play with boys.  It is like learning a foreign language trying to figure out what to do with the cars or dinosaurs or army men.  I just don’t do any of it right (according to my always right son). 

Yesterday we were playing with dinosaurs and Army men.  I was assigned the job of T-Rex.  I was feeling really good about it because T-Rex is like the boss of all bosses.  So as I am playing I learn there are lots or rules (he cant go in the water, he can’t eat that, he can’t take those, he can’t run that fast…..).  So eventually I decided that his short little arms were hilarious and T-Rex needed someone to tie his pretend shoes and someone to feed him his lunchy.  Aiden at first went along with it….UNTIL T-Rex asked Sloane to hold his hand because he was scared.  Where of which Sloane put down her assigned job and began to hold T-Rex’s hand.  Aiden had had it with us at that point. 

I do puzzles, I do games, I do outside….I just don’t do Barbie’s, dinosaurs, army men, and baby dolls.  I never played with them and I just don’t know what to do with them.  It is awkward and weird to pretend.  I was clearly not born with an imagination.

As I am writing this my kids are playing, TOGETHER, not fighting, not arguing, JUST PLAYING with each other.  It is the most amazing noise I have ever heard.  I know this won’t last long.  Aiden is quite bossy and Sloane is quite independent so the two don’t mesh well.  I will love it while it lasts.  Their imaginations are incredible.  I will admit to anyone that they didn’t get that from their mama.

And the tears have begun….I must go.

Acceptance and Tolerance

This is gonna get deep……

Is it ok for people to think differently than you do?  Is it ok for someone to have their own beliefs and stand by them?  What if their beliefs are very different than your beliefs, is it still ok? 

It feels like the world is filled with people who live for ‘Freedom of Speech’ but does that make it all right to say anything you want? I think with ‘Freedom of Speech’ comes a responsibility and I feel like there are not enough people in the world who take ownership of that responsibility. 

It is ok to believe what you believe.  It is ok to feel differently than someone else.  It is ok to think differently than someone else.

It is not ok to be hateful to someone who thinks differently than you.  It is not ok to exclude people for being different than you. It is not ok to be closed minded.

So here goes, what makes it ok to hate someone because of their homosexuality, race, religion?  What makes it ok for someone to be unaccepting of other people because they think or live differently than you?

I struggle with being accepting of people who aren’t accepting.  I just don’t understand how someone being gay, black, Muslim has any affect on you whatsoever.  So here I am NOT being accepting of people who aren’t being accepting of other people.  I am obviously wrong and really need to just accept that there will always be people that will believe differently than I do.

I hope to always teach my children to accept people, no matter what.  To be willing to understand other people and accepting of their personal choices, even if those people are different than us. I hope to always teach my children to be respectful and loving towards all people.

All I want for Christmas.....

So, it is almost Christmas and I finally figured out what I want Santa to bring me……I want him to bring me two children that listen.  Specifically, Aiden and Sloane.  I don’t want new children, I really like the two that I have…but, they don’t listen! Think he can handle that?  

I have two great little people.  They are happy and healthy and loving and friendly....but lordamercy they don't listen to anything we say.  In fact when they do listen I am so shocked that sometimes I am speechless and confused at their behavior.  Generally they are not defiant or rude they just completely tune out any direction that comes their way.  It is amazing.  I wish I had that ability....

My hope is that Santa can fix my problem because I have clearly done something wrong along the way!

Frankle

We have an elf in our house and his name is Frankle. Frankle has made our life pretty exciting; it is amazing what my kids will do the impress him.  Frankle shows up each morning watching over Aiden and Sloane.  He flies back to the North Pole each night to report on Aiden and Sloane’s behavior (to Santa) then flies back.  He shows up in some wacky places each morning! 

The first night Frankle showed up this year (this is his third year with our family) Sloane slept THROUGH THE NIGHT. She woke up after sleeping through the night and I said, “Do you know who is so proud of you?” (Me obviously!?!?) She replies with, “Santa!” Oh really? Yes, dear Santa has been getting up with you 2-3 times a night since you were born!

My kids have become little tattle tales.  They tell on each other to Frankle…. it’s almost a little disturbing.  I like to think that I am using Frankle as a fun tradition, but I think I am using Frankle as a pawn to make my kids behave.  That clearly makes me an amazing mother.

Having Frankle around makes my kids want to do well so that he can give a good report to Santa each night.  It has NOTHING to do with them ACTUALLY wanting to do well because doing well is just the right thing to do.  Drives me crazy! Yet, I continue to hear myself say, “What do you think Frankle is going to have to say about that?!?”

Which brings me to my next point.  I don’t think my kids have any idea what Christmas is really all about.  I take full responsibility for this because, well, I don’t actually know what Christmas is all about.  I know a few details and have come to my own conclusions over the years (the Nativity scene is quite helpful once you know who each character represents….now that was a hard lesson to learn as a kid. Who is who and what was their role?!? Lordy, who would have thought that the baby was Jesus?!  I always assumed Jesus was always a man, never a baby….all those confusing years).

I need to find some good picture books to read to my kids so they have a better understanding of what we are celebrating and why.  It is not all about the presents….although that part is awesome!

a beetle?

I am open to a lot of things....but I am not alright with a man driving a VW beetle.  I think the only valid excuse is you took your wife's beetle to fill it up with gas.